Self Harmer

The pain took it’s effect on me as soon as I let the sharp blade run across my scarred arm.

“Filthy, Fat, Disgusting” I chant to myself, so I have a reason to cause this pain upon myself.

People come and go in my life, but none ever know that I do this to myself. 

I feel like I’m in a world that only I know what’s going on.

That every single person in this world are living in a dream,

yet I am forever stuck in the brutual yet comforting reality. 

Tears form in my crystal blue eyes. 

Why can’t anybody see what I’m doing?

 Why can’t they see I am my own worst enemy? 

The blood is starting to trickling out of my ghost like, scarred arm. 

“You deserve this, you can’t do anything right!” I yell at myself.

Why can’t anybody see what I’m doing?

If you did know, would you help me?

Would you be scared if I told you, I like this pain?

Don’t go across the street, go down.

The pace of the blood is starting to pick up now.

This is my safe zone.

But I cut to deep.

I panic, trying to stop the bleeding.

I’ve really done it this time.

The blood is going everywhere. 

I’m done.

I’m finished.

Their going to know.

I’m a self harmer.

6 months ago with 0 notes

due to personal problems, i am no longer able to update this blog nor it’s writing.

i am keeping the blog up however, but will update it when i can.

please feel free to unfollow. 

when i have a chance i will update my writing. 

sorry for the nuisance.

you all don’t know how much i loved sharing my writing with you all.

i’ve meet amazing people on here and you really were sweet!

anyway, hope you enjoy my writing/posts i’m leaving

i currently have 103 un-read messages in my inbox, i will try my best to answer them all the next time i’m on!

much love,
atani xx 

7 months ago with 0 notes